How it feels to deal with Michael Myers.

You know I always thought the worst occupation in the Halloween movies were the jobs the medical examiner or the attending at a morgue are stuck doing. Let’s not forget the ambulance driver and their partner. There should be no need to explain why these jobs always seemed like the worst jobs to fans of the movies but to those that are not in the know; these people never make it. They are often dead within ten minutes of their introduction to the viewer. Their deaths are almost always gruesome and done in a brutal manner that leaves no mistake, they are dead. 

I often wonder what is going through the mind of the person who is told that they have to deal with the cadaver of Michael Myers. Why not just leave the building as soon as his body comes into the room? I mean I know it’s your job but are you really about to keep it? You know the stories. You know who you have on your table. I would feel personally insulted, as if my employer was trying to tell me a message and not the do your job kind of message. I would walk right out the door as soon as the wheels on the man’s table stopped. 

The job of these poor victims should be the last thing on their mind when this open the bag and stab you with his mysterious knife, that he seems to find everywhere. There’s one Halloween when the Examiner is told that Michael Myers is one the table and to get an autograph. This person looks at the table in fear but still walks up to the table and unzips the bag; lady are you insane? That voice in the back of your head that’s telling you to run should be heeded. There’s no need to check the bag, you know that creature is alive and waiting. 

I wonder what thoughts flit through the mind of curious souls that just have to know. What possesses these forgetful sallies as they become another number on the ever expanding list for Myers? Even Jason Voorhies has felt the cold morgue table, but it was only a twice, after that he is resurrected or possesses others. Michael Myers is an indestructible locomotive, that continues to move after his target without any possible end. Their employer should give the employee that has to deal with his body some consideration. 

Is it more important for the examiner to stay on the job and continue to work when dealing with a known mass murderer? A murderer that has become proficient at killing people in the medical profession. Would you remain working and examine the body of a killer that you know is just waiting for the right time to kill you? 


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